Tag Archives: sex

Divided

I want too much
again
after I thought
I’d convinced myself
to enjoy
whatever
leftovers
he gives me
which is all he can give
because he’s giving
to her too
and why should I
want more
than his love
which he promised
is mine
even though
she gets his bed
and his time
and his considerate lies
to keep her heart
from breaking
the way mine
is breaking
because
I know
what she doesn’t know—
that neither of us
will ever have him
whole.

 

 

 

 

DeMaris
5-20-17

Justification

You are candy
and decadence
and everything
I shouldn’t have
because you are
bad for me and
I’m bad for you
even though we
feel right in the
bright afternoon
laying together
without words
and without any
need to speak or
ask questions or
try to make sense
of what we are
doing by coming
here again to get
away from what
our lives mean
in the absence of
each other, which
is what most lives
mean—which is
to say it’s a kind
of duty we want
to get away from
for a short time
and we happen to
be perfect for each
other if you can
look at it that way.

 

 

 

 

DeMaris
4-1-17

“Hylas and the Nymphs” John William Waterhouse, 1896

 

 

Modern Complexity

Days like this
remind you how silly it is
to get too comfortable
with his skin next to yours
since you can be
turned inside out so easily
when he reminds you
in an innocent and flippant
kind of way
that you’re not the only one
he loves or likes to please—
and because you are
a scavenger for his affection
you laugh and smile
and pretend it’s perfectly
alright with you
that he goes home
hoping to get lucky with her
and for some reason
he wants you to know it.

 

 

 

DeMaris
3-25-17

 

 

How to Forgive

I can remember
with clarity
how much I hated
my father
after my mother told me
that he’d cheated
back when I was only
five years old
and for years
I couldn’t look at him
without feeling
like he betrayed me too
even though I read
Bridges of Madison County
twice
and watched the movie
seventeen times
and I loved the way
those two characters
loved each other
despite the fact
that Francesca was married
and I forgave them
for making love
on the living room floor
which is where
I’ve found myself lately
beside a man
who never meant
to become my lover
or the kind of man
who’d make it possible
for me to realize
how fast a grudge
can turn to empathy
and all of a sudden
I am the one who is sorry
for all those years
I acted like I could never
be swept away.

 

 

 

DeMaris
3-23-17

Hummingbirds

 

No one thinks
to themselves
how awful
when these creatures
fly at each other
with violence
in their wings—
with slender beaks
nipping snipping
fighting for the nectar
of the honeysuckle
and columbine—
we accept that survival
is a good excuse
to be greedy,
and because
they are beautiful
in their
metallic green dress
and wine colored collar
we forgive them
for things we humans
could never
get away with—
especially females
who aren’t looking
for a long term
relationship
but want to be
impressed into bed
for just one night
of spectacular sex
with the partner
of her choice
without feeling guilty
or worried about
the violent judgment
of the righteous—
who most likely
have imagined
what it would be like
to be that audacious
and that brave.

 

 

 

DeMaris
3-11-17