You like to think you have it
most of the time—
that it’s one of your possessions,
saved for and bought
with experience and time.
Does it really matter
(you wonder to yourself)
if you leave it at home when
you know you’ll be seeing her again?
And all you want
is for her to know everything
she’s meant to you
all these years – even now—
and in this public café
you’ll get the chance
to apologize for the ending scene
you caused the last time you spoke—
when control was something
you only knew how to lose.
DeMaris Gaunt
3-28-15